I have noticed a growing breed in town – the White Pants Brigade.
As you’re going about your day, especially now it’s summertime in Adelaide, look about. You will see several women wearing white pants. Now cast your gaze upwards and you will see that the female inside the attire is over 40. Guaranteed.
Like Botox and Sauvignon Blanc, white pants seem to be a growing trend in this age bracket. For any women who are fighting the aging process and believe that white pants make them look fresh and young I have some advice. After two years of researching and observing the sex and age of individuals who leave the house wearing white pants, the result is 95% are females over 40.
There is no greater signal you can give the world that you have exited your 30s than wearing white pants. It’s as much of a give-away as doing the grapevine and dancing the Bus Stop.
I too caught the bug and began wearing white pants. Just two weeks ago in fact, I pulled out my Paul Smiths; my white Paul Smiths. It shits me that I’ve made this observation, because I really like my Paul Smiths. I bought them at a boutique in North Adelaide, where I rarely shop, and I wore them in my 30s to the Usher concert.
I was in the second row with the best view of Usher – the most unbelievable dancer I’ve ever seen live. Sitting behind me was Crows legend, number 23, Andrew McLeod. The discovery that Bunji was directly behind me made it rather difficult for me to keep my focus on the stage. I was in the unique position of having a hot man directly in front of me and another directly behind me. I was the meat in a hot man sandwich, and the bread was rye.
But now back to the topic… white pants…
Aside from the fact that white pants get dirty easily, and even more so after having a few Sav Blancs, there is the well known principle that white is not a slimming colour. That is not a deterrent for the White Pants Brigade and neither should it be! For most, reaching 40 (or thereabouts) brings the acceptance that they are wonderful just as they are. Except for their age, and their wrinkles. Enter white pants and Botox.
It’s almost a statement to the world.
“I wore jeans all through my 20s and black pants all through my 30s. I’m now 40, fabulous and comfortable with my body and fuck it, I’m wearing white!”
Fashion in all its varieties is fine by me. Express yourself I say! It’s the unoriginality of everyone copying each other that I find amusing.
Now if I was to see an over 40s woman wearing white pants and sporting a mohawk, that would be something.